


Sanctuary:  Home For The Holidays

by Ink_Gypsy, Keye



Series: Sanctuary Universe [8]
Category: Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: M/M, Sanctuary, holiday fics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-24
Updated: 2014-12-24
Packaged: 2018-03-03 08:03:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2843945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ink_Gypsy/pseuds/Ink_Gypsy, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Keye/pseuds/Keye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sean and Elijah spend an old-fashioned Christmas, their first together, at home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sanctuary:  Home For The Holidays

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after Hannah's Thanksgiving visit in _Giving Thanks_.

The first of December arrived in a bluster, with temps in the lower twenties and snow falling from gray skies. But the cabin was warm and comfy, a fire crackling in the hearth, the wood box freshly filled. Sean sat at his desk with the old laptop in front of him, working out the plot for his new novel. His completely new novel, because he’d figured out what he wanted to write at last and it was beginning to come together. The tapping of the keys as he worked was new as well. He did enjoy writing with pen and paper, always had, but the computer was definitely faster, and he had other things in his life now to enjoy.

Elijah sat on the couch working at his computer, ear buds in, humming along to his music. It was a small distraction, but Sean welcomed it, turning to look at him. He was intent on something, leaned forward staring at the screen, fingers hovering over the keyboard. He didn’t look very comfortable. The couch was little better for sitting than sleeping. He needed a desk with a proper chair. Sean slowly smiled to himself. That would be a worthy Christmas gift for Elijah, something made with his own hands. Sean had done some decent wood working in his youth. Gramps had thought he might take up furniture making. Gramps had been disappointed when he didn’t.

Sean calculated dimensions, sizing up Elijah’s delicate frame as he sat there, though it was hardly necessary. He knew Elijah’s body intimately from the tips of his adorable toes to the ends of his silky hair. Too much distraction. Sean forced his mind back to the matter at hand, which was an exciting one. The cabin was cramped already, but they could move his desk over a bit more and fit in Elijah’s next to it, a low desk so he could gaze out the window at the woods as he sat there, with narrow shelves for books and things on either side.

Elijah abruptly looked up and caught Sean staring at him, and shifted his laptop away as if he was doing something he didn’t want seen. Sean blinked, wondering if he himself looked like he was hatching some secret. Elijah took out his ear buds. Sean stood up, covering his tracks.

“Does the generator sound off to you?”

Elijah listened, and shrugged a little. “Does it sound off to you, Sean?”

It didn’t really, but, “I’d better go check it out.”

Elijah smiled sweetly. “Okay. Don’t freeze.”

Good thought. Sean was already pulling on his coat, but took down a stocking cap to put on over his ears. “I’ll be right back.”

It was windy out and cold, though it was going to get a lot colder. It felt good to Sean, the air crisp and clean. A blanket of snow covered the ground and the trees all around, and the bird feeders were in full use with winter set in. He made a mental note to refill them while he was out, but he was on a mission just then and hurried on to the tool shed, opened the door and stepped inside out of the wind. It wasn’t overly large. He pulled the string to turn on the overhead light, just a bare bulb in a simple socket. He’d need to rig up a better light, and clear some work space. He rearranged what needed to stay, and hauled the rest over to the enclosed storage area under the cabin.

It took some searching and shifting of heavy crates, but he found Grandpa’s old handmade wooden toolbox, and took it back with him to the shed. It would be a major undertaking without power tools, but it would be quieter, and far less costly in fuel for the generator. He opened the toolbox and took out the hammers and chisels and planes, one by one, with fond memories of his grandfather. It was going to be a lot of hard work, a true labor of love, the perfect gift for Elijah.

*******

When Sean came back inside, his cheeks ruddy from the cold, Elijah pulled out his ear buds and asked, "So was the generator okay?"

"Fine," Sean confirmed. "It was just my ears playing tricks on me, I guess, but when I was checking I found we're low on gasoline. I think we need to keep a bigger supply on hand in case we get snowed in. In fact, I might go into town today and pick up some."

"Do you need me to go with you?" Elijah wanted to know.

"No, I can handle it," Sean assured him. "I won't be long and it's silly for both of us to go out in the cold. Anything you want me to pick up while I'm out?"

"No, I'm good," Elijah replied, getting up and giving Sean a goodbye kiss. Sean seemed surprised that he hadn't argued about being left behind, but didn't question it. Picking up his keys, he went back out and moments later Elijah heard the jeep's engine roar to life, listening until the sound had faded and Sean was on his way.

Normally, Elijah would have jumped at the chance to go into town with Sean, but having some time alone would help him get his project done that much sooner. He always worked better with music, but before he'd donned his headphones, he had enjoyed hearing the steady tapping of the computer keys coming from across the room where Sean worked on his own laptop, and considering how good a typist Sean was, Elijah couldn't imagine why he'd rather put his thoughts down using pen and paper. But regardless of how he was doing it, the important thing was that Sean was writing again. Sean hadn't said so, but it gave Elijah pleasure to imagine that he was Sean's inspiration. What did writers call it? A Muse, that was it. And the idea of being the Muse of the man he loved made Elijah feel proud. When he first came up with the idea for Sean's gift, he wasn't sure if he should go ahead with it, but when Sean began writing again, Elijah took it as a sign.

The idea for creating a website for Sean had come to him at Thanksgiving when Sean told Hannah that most of his books were out of print. Elijah was sure that wouldn't have happened if Sean had kept himself in the public eye instead of retreating to the cabin after Daniel's death. It still amazed Elijah that Sean didn’t already have his own website. Just about every writer, musician and entertainer did. Hell, with all the social media sites, people spent countless hours online attempting to turn themselves into celebrities, and Elijah hated that a talented man like Sean didn’t have a site where people could go to learn about him and his work.

Unfortunately, a website with your personal domain name cost money, but many sites offered free space for blogs, so Elijah was starting with one of them. Eventually, when he was making some money of his own, he'd build a real website for Sean with his own domain name.

He'd been tempted to use Sean's money, but to Elijah, having a guy pay for his own gift was just wrong. Sean had such trust in him that he'd given Elijah access to his bank account and his credit cards, telling him to use the cards or withdraw money to get anything he needed or even just wanted. Living here with Sean, Elijah didn't need much. The only thing he really wanted was a new digital camera, but since he'd ruined Sean's, there was no way he was going to use Sean's money to pay for another. He'd do without one until he could pay for it himself because it was important to him to pay his own way. He knew Sean's generosity had come out of his love and wasn't a display of wealth as his gifts from Pedar had always been, but his contributing financially to their life together would make them a real couple, and Elijah wanted to make that happen in some way. He just needed to figure out how.

Now that he was alone, Elijah immersed himself in his project, searching out and downloading graphics to use on the blog. Then he sorted through all the photos he'd taken of Sean, grateful he'd transferred them from Sean's computer to his new laptop. For the blog, he wanted to use only pictures in which he thought Sean looked the most handsome, but since he thought Sean looked handsome in every photo, it was hard to choose.

In a momentary flash of uncertainty, Elijah wondered if he was making a mistake. Sean was a very private person. What if he didn't want this invasion of his privacy? Not that Elijah was planning to post anything personal on the site. He was going to showcase Sean's novels, posting excerpts from them in hopes that people would seek them out and have his publisher consider reprinting them. Maybe his publisher would publish them as e-books. Surely having people discover or rediscover his books would make Sean happy, especially now that he was working on something new.

Thinking about Sean's new project had Elijah's eyes wandering to the desk where Sean's laptop stood open. Sean hadn't said he couldn't look at his work in progress, so he could have a look and Sean would be none the wiser. What if Sean was writing a fictionalized version of their story? Elijah went to the desk, determined take a quick peek, but at the last moment he stopped himself and closed the lid on the computer to avoid temptation. He wasn't going to read it without Sean's permission. Since he was working on the blog in secret, it was only fair that Sean should have some secrets of his own.

*******

Sean wanted something special and knew he wouldn’t find it locally, so he drove almost an hour to the nearest hardware store that had a good selection of lumber. He browsed the stacks, taking in the scents of fresh cut wood, and settled on a rich, dark mahogany. Choosing a style that would appeal to Elijah took longer, but he found plans at last for a small bureau, not too ornate but not too simple either, fine details, lots of drawers and cubbyholes for stashing things. There were no plans available for a rolling chair to go with it, and the chair would be every bit as complicated as the desk, maybe more so. He did find a photo of one that would match the style, leafing through a furniture design book. But he was going to need more than a picture.

“Big project planned there?”

Sean turned to find one of the shop clerks standing with arms crossed, an older man, Carl it said on his name tag. Sean smiled. “Getting bigger every minute.” He didn’t like to think it, but he might not have time enough to have it done for Christmas. Regardless, he had to try. “Do you suppose plans could be found for a chair like this?” He showed the man the photo.

Carl studied it carefully. “Well, it would likely take some searching. Might take months. If you need it soon, I could draw up a plan for you.” Sean probably looked a little dubious. The man chuckled. “I’ve got fifty years experience as a professional carpenter, Sonny. You have experience?”

Sean said, “I do, but it’s been quite a few years.”

Carl nodded. “If you can follow basic instructions, I can get you through it. You’ll want to get this done for Christmas, I’m guessing. We can rough-cut all your lumber if you want and give you a head start.”

Sean couldn’t help considering that. He’d wanted to do it all himself, by hand. But there just wasn’t time enough. He didn’t know as it was how he would explain to Elijah all the hours he’d be spending alone in the tool shed. He slowly nodded. “Yes. That sounds like a very good idea. Thank you, Carl.” It would cost a pretty penny more, but so be it.

Carl took out his notepad and started jotting in it. They looked at the desk plans, and picked out hardware, special ordering some of it because he wanted top quality. He was quoted a cost that was steep indeed, but not outrageous for what he was asking. And they promised to have it all ready to go in four days. It was four days out of the precious time he had to work, but it would take him more than that to hand cut all the pieces himself.

It was going to be more than a little crazy, but Sean headed for home at last feeling hopeful that he’d be able to do it. He’d wanted to pick up something for Elijah while he was out. It was already later than he’d meant to be, but he could make a quick stop at Betty’s Bake Shop on the way. If he hurried.

*******

Elijah was so engrossed in his work that he lost track of time. It wasn't until his stomach growled that he realized that hours had passed since Sean had gone out. A trip into town to the general store took no more than an hour, and getting up to check the mantle clock, Elijah saw that Sean had been gone at least four. Elijah smiled at the realization that he wasn't the only one with a surprise up his sleeve. Sean was obviously up to something, too.

Being gone for so long, whatever Sean was doing must be something very special, so Elijah decided the least he deserved was a hot meal when he got home. He went into the kitchen to start making dinner.

Before he met Sean, Elijah's usual dinner was take-out Chinese, a burger or a pizza, and his idea of cooking was throwing a frozen dinner in the microwave or putting a Pop-Tart in the toaster. Sean had changed that, showing him the basics for making a good, plain meal, and he'd learned more from Tilda. He recalled with great fondness that first day in her kitchen when she'd drafted him as her sous chef, and the satisfaction he'd gotten from making even a simple dish from scratch. 

Then Anna, Sean's mother, had sent him one of her much loved cookbooks, marking all of Sean's favorite foods, and Elijah had attempted to prepare one. He still remembered the look of pleasure on Sean's face as he'd tasted the result, and how incredibly proud of himself he'd felt. After that first try, he'd been encouraged to try other recipes, most with great success. Now he and Sean shared the cooking as well as the housework.

Leafing through the cookbook, Elijah settled on one of his own favorites for tonight, pasta in cheese sauce with peas and ham. It was simple, hearty, and perfect for a cold winter night. He set to work. Knowing Sean, Elijah expected when he came home, he'd be bringing dessert.

*******

The lights were on in the cabin, night falling, as Sean pulled up at home finally and shut off the Jeep’s engine. He hurried up the steps with bakeshop carton in hand and pushed open the door, his excuse for being so late re-playing once more in his head. But the aroma that enveloped him as he stepped inside drove everything else from his thoughts. Elijah was in the kitchen, pulling a casserole dish from the oven, and looked up with a grin.

“Wow, excellent timing!”

Sean gave him a loving smile, stepping forward. “You fixed dinner. It smells fantastic.” And he’d set the table, with sprigs of juniper stuck in a little vase at the center. Sean held up his pie box. “I brought dessert.” He set it on the counter, and caught Elijah in his arms for a kiss and cuddle.

Elijah hugged him back like he’d never let go. “What did you get for dessert, Sean?”

Sean had to think for a moment. “Pecan pie, fresh baked, Sorry I’m so late.” Elijah had to wonder why. “I got it into my head to make those trellises for the garden, so we’ll have them ready to go in the spring. Anyway, I ended up at a lumber yard about an hour away. It took longer than I’d expected.” It sounded painfully lame when he actually said it, but Elijah just leaned back to look at him and smiled a little slyly.

“Did you find what you needed?”

Sean nodded. He started to say he’d have to go back in a few days to pick up something or other he’d had to order, but that would be pushing his luck, surely. Elijah said dinner was ready, and went to bring it to the table. “It smells great, Elijah, did I say?” 

It tasted great too. Sean praised Elijah’s prowess in the kitchen, as he did at every opportunity. They cleaned up after and washed the dishes, then settled on the couch together for dessert and a movie. It took Elijah a while to decide on the movie. He finally gave Sean a sheepish sort of look and asked if they could watch A Christmas Carol, the old one. Sean smiled at him back and said, “Sure.” Elijah found it on his Cloud, and got it started, then they snuggled close and had their dessert.

“Oh yum, I’ve never had pecan pie.”

“Really?”

“Really. Hannah made a mincemeat pie once, because my Dad wanted it. It was disgusting.” Elijah laughed, and gave Sean a hopeful look. “Can we make cookies to send everyone for Christmas? There are lots of recipes in your Mom’s book.”

Sean remembered his mother baking for days on end at the holidays and filling boxes with goodies to give away. It would be more time he couldn’t spend on the desk, but he wouldn’t have denied Elijah anything that put a twinkle in his eye. “It’ll take some planning, but we can do that.”

“We can make Christmas cards too, Sean, that would be fun.”

It had been years since Sean had a fun holiday. They were both due. He slid an arm around Elijah to hold him close. “We’ll do it up right, love.”

******

Elijah hadn't enjoyed making Christmas preparations this much since he'd been a kid and his mother had been alive. Debbie had loved decorating , and like Sean's mother, enjoyed baking for the holidays. Cookies, cakes, brownies, even homemade candies were plentiful in the Wood home in the weeks before Christmas and into the New Year because Debbie not only gave her creations away as gifts, but made sure there was always enough left over for her family to enjoy. With Elijah's sweet tooth, it was amazing he retained his boyish frame. Just lucky metabolism, he figured, but he was grateful for it none the less, especially when chocolate was involved. He was anxious to try his hand at baking, but since he had mostly watched his mother do the baking, Elijah found he had a steep learning curve. Luckily Sean had learned well from his own mother, and was happy to teach Elijah everything Anna had taught him.

Once he'd been old enough to buy commercially-manufactured Christmas cards, Elijah had stopped making his own with construction paper and crayons, but with the greeting card software Sean had installed on his new laptop, Elijah rediscovered the enjoyment of making his own holiday cards. And with Sean's talent for writing, every card they sent would contain an original message tailored specifically to its recipient, something they would treasure for years.

In-between the decorating, baking and card creation, Elijah continued working on Sean's blog, trying to get it just right before unveiling it, determined it would be ready for Christmas. Since Sean kept disappearing into the tool shed to work on his own project, which Elijah knew he'd love whatever it turned out to be, he could work on his own without interruption. It was a lot of work, but it didn't feel that way, not when he imagined Sean seeing it for the first time. There was still a niggle of fear that Sean wouldn't appreciate what he'd done, might even resent it, but Elijah tried to push that doubt to the back of his mind. Instead, he continued to believe that once he saw it, Sean would realize how much love and devotion that had gone into its creation and thank Elijah for thinking of it. And with Sean writing again, this seemed like the perfect time.

The most time-consuming part was typing up excerpts from Sean's novels. Since Sean had written his books in longhand, then hired a typist to type up the pages so he could send them to his publisher, there were no word-processing documents to work with, so Elijah had to type sections from the pages of the print copies. A scanner would have made things easier, but knowing he worked with digital photos, Sean hadn't included one with Elijah's new laptop. That could be a possibility somewhere down the line, but for now, Elijah had to do it the old-fashioned way, and if it turned out as well as he hoped, it was going to be so worth it.

As much as he'd enjoyed the preparations he'd made so far, the Christmas tradition Elijah was looking forward to most of all was putting up the Christmas tree.

Pedar had never wanted to get a fresh tree. Too much mess, he'd said, so the brownstone had always showcased a huge, artificial tree done up with coordinated lights and decorations. Elijah thought it was pretty, but without the fresh smell of pine in the room, it just didn't feel like Christmas.

There had always been a fresh tree in the Wood home at Christmas, decorated with lights of different colors, ornaments of many different styles, and tons of tinsel, but it had been bought from a Christmas tree lot. What was going to make this year's tree so special was that not only would it be his first chosen with Sean, but to Elijah's delight, Sean had promised him he could choose any tree he wanted, not from a lot, but from out in the woods, and that Sean would cut it down himself. Just the thought of it made Elijah feel like he was five years old again, and he couldn't wait for the morning when they'd head into the wood to pick it out and cart it home.

“This one, Sean?” Elijah turned to him, pink-cheeked and dusted with snow, standing beside the tree of his choice.

It was a young spruce, nicely shaped. It had been growing a good few years to reach five feet, and that was a shame, but the copse was crowded. Taking out one would allow its neighbors to better prosper. Sean smiled and nodded. “Perfect.” He got down on his belly to saw off the tree’s trunk at ground level, then brushed himself off and hoisted it onto his shoulder to haul back to the cabin.

Elijah cheerfully marched ahead, carrying the saw and holding back low-hanging branches. It was less than a week until Christmas, and there was still work to do on the desk. Sean had begun to resent it a little, not making the desk for Elijah, but the time apart it required, time spent doing anything but being together. At least the running around was done. They’d gone out the day before, to get their cards and packages sent and to do some last shopping. Time to settle in and enjoy each other, and if Elijah’s gift had to be a tad late, it wouldn’t be the end of the world.

They’d dug out the old Christmas lights and baubles from the back of the closet and made a fresh pine bough garland for over the hearth, and the cabin looked picture perfect. In fact, Elijah had used his phone to take a selfie of them sitting in front of a glowing fire to send with his homemade cards. Maybe it was all just a little bit over the top, but Sean wanted Elijah’s Christmas to be as good as it could be.

Elijah held open the door for him as he shook off the tree over the porch rail and then dragged it inside. “We can put it there in front of the window.” Just not too close to the hearth. They didn’t want it dropping all of its needles before the new year. Elijah brought the stand and they got it settled upright and secured. Elijah brought a pitcher of water for it, then was off again to the kitchen. “We need popcorn to string and hot chocolate, and cookies.”

Sean went along to do the cocoa, while Elijah went about fixing a big bowl of popcorn and piling a plate with cookies. Cookies they had in abundance, from both Mom and Til, as well all the ones they’d made themselves that weren’t perfect enough to gift. Cookies enough to last all winter, maybe. Thankfully, Sean had been doing a pretty good job of burning off the extra calories. He couldn’t help thinking about it, that it would be a weight off his mind to get the hardware mounted on Elijah’s chair. That was something he could screw up and he’d be glad to have it done, with nothing left but final polishing, and sticking on a big bow.

“What are you thinking about, Sean?”

Sean looked up, and said, “Nothing. You.” He smiled. Elijah smiled too, popping a Snickerdoodle in his mouth. Elijah surely knew he wasn’t spending all those hours in the tool shed just futzing around, but he’d given up making excuses, and Elijah kindly hadn’t questioned him about it, yet.

They spent the evening decorating the Christmas tree and putting under it all the presents they’d gotten from family and friends, then sat on the couch together, admiring it.

Elijah curled himself into the crook of Sean’s arm with a sly little smile. “I know you’re making me something.”

Sean smiled to himself, nuzzling his face in Elijah’s hair. “Caught. I’m making you the most fabulous garden trellis you’ll ever see, with a fancy lattice on top and filigreed posts. You can grow flowers on it. And a bench for sitting on, of course.”

Elijah laughed, then looked at him, seeming to wonder if he might be serious.

*******

Sean was most likely kidding about the trellis, but if he wasn't, Elijah realized he was okay with that, even though he'd never given a lot of thought to flowers.

There had always been fresh flowers in the brownstone, but they'd always felt more like the works of art Pedar had coveted rather than living things. To Elijah, flowers were something you bought at a florist shop, something he'd surprised Debbie with on Mother's Day and her birthday, and once she was old enough to appreciate them, one of his birthday gifts to Hannah had always been a small bouquet of flowers.

Before meeting Sean, sitting under a trellis surrounded by flowers wasn't something he ever saw himself doing , but now that he'd made his home here with Sean, where nature was all around them, he could see such a fantasy becoming a reality. Sitting under that trellis beside Sean was something he could enjoy because Sean would enjoy it, and for Elijah, making Sean happy was like giving himself a gift. So if his gift turned out to be the lattice-topped trellis, complete with bench, Elijah was going to love it.

*******

Sean’s family had always opened presents on Christmas Eve. Elijah said he was used to having to wait until morning. They discussed it and decided at last that Christmas Eve should be for family gifts, and they’d save their gifts to each other for in the morning. They sat on the rug in front of a toasty fire, with cocoa and cookies at hand, and started with the presents his Mom had sent. There was one for each of them, and another large one for both of them together. They opened the individual ones. Sean’s was a book on ultra light aircraft, cool. Elijah’s was a cookbook.

“Heartland Cookery,” Elijah read. “A Midwest Journey.” He slowly flipped through the pages of recipes and folk drawings. “Ooh, look, Sean.” There were landscape photos also, some very nice ones. Elijah read the note that was enclosed. “Sean said you like to cook, Elijah, and I thought you might enjoy this. Hope we’ll get to see you both soon. Love, Anna.” Elijah hugged the book to his chest. “I love your Mom, Sean.”

Sean smiled. “Me, too. She can be a peach when she wants to be.” He let Elijah open the one for both of them, and wasn’t much surprised when it turned out to be flannel pajamas. They were high quality at least, thick and soft, Elijah’s blue and green plaid, his green and black. Elijah promptly grabbed his up and went into the bathroom to change. Sean laughed, “You don’t have to wear them, love. I won’t tell.”

Elijah called back that he liked them, and came out presently to model them for Sean, striking one pose and another. She’d gotten the size right. He looked delectable in them. But then, Elijah would look like that in anything. Elijah said they were comfortable, and threw himself down into Sean’s arms. “You should put on yours, too.”

Sean gave him a kiss, feeling acutely the curves and planes of his body under softly sliding flannel. “I think not, Elijah.” Elijah insisted, and starting unbuttoning his shirt. Sean gave in, and let Elijah help him out of his clothes. He was going to pull on the pajama bottoms over his skivvies, but Elijah said he had to take them off. Sean stood and stripped, and put on his green and black plaid pajamas, all the while imagining Elijah with nothing on under his. They _were_ soft and comfy.

Elijah took his hand and pulled him back down to the rug, and handed him the small package his brother had sent to him along with Mom’s. That was a curiosity. Sean looked at Elijah, who smiled encouragingly. He unwrapped it, and found in his hand the old pocketknife he thought he'd lost when he was a kid. There was a note of sorts. It just said, _sorry_. Sean showed it to Elijah, who leaned closer.

“I thought I lost it, but he must have taken it.” Sean turned it in his hand, thinking about what it meant, that Mack should decide to fess up and return it now. He hadn’t really talked much with Elijah about Mack, but Elijah knew they didn’t always see eye to eye.

“It must be a good thing, Sean. It’s like he’s…reaching out. Don’t you think?”

Sean hugged Elijah close to his side. “It seems so.”

*******

Elijah wanted it to be so, for Sean's sake. Sean hadn't told him much about Mack, and nothing about why they didn't get along. He didn't force the issue, believing that when Sean was ready, he'd open up and tell him more about what had come between them. Elijah had no real relationship with Zach, and he didn't want that for Sean and Mack. He hoped Sean could forget their differences and become close to his brother again. Maybe the return of the item stolen in childhood would be the first step toward healing the rift between them.

"My family needs to be represented, too," Elijah declared, "such as it is." He got up and pulled a box from behind the tree where he had put it last week. "That last package I got from Hannah? These were in it." He reached into the box, taking out a small gift-wrapped package and handing it to Sean. "This one's for you."

Sean seemed genuinely touched. "This wasn't necessary."

"Trust me, Hannah wouldn't have done it unless she wanted to. She never mentioned she was going to do this, so I have no idea what it is."

"I'm sure I'll love whatever it is," Sean replied, "but I hope Hannah knows her acceptance of me in your life was the best gift she could ever give me."

"Does that mean you don't want this?" Elijah teased, reaching for the package.

Sean snatched it out of his reach. "No way. I love presents."

"So open it already," Elijah urged.

Sean did, tearing off the wrapping paper to find a simple wooden box with a hinged lid. He lifted the lid to reveal a lacquer-barreled fountain pen, embossed with ancient runes.

"What a beautiful instrument," Sean said, taking it out of the box and examining it, "but I don't understand why Hannah would buy this for me."

A folded piece of paper had fallen to the floor when Sean opened the box, and Elijah picked it up and handed it to him. "Maybe this will explain things."

Unfolding the paper, Sean read aloud, "Dear Sean, Elijah told me you like to write with a fountain pen, and after reading your books, I want to make sure you have the tools you need to write more of them. Thank you for making my brother so happy. Merry Christmas, Hannah."

Elijah bit his bottom lip. "I didn't think to tell her you're using your laptop for your writing now."

Sean smiled. "I still like to make notes in longhand, so I plan to make good use of this."

Elijah thought Sean was only being kind, but it pleased him just the same, and his heart was filled with love for his sister.

"What did you get from Hannah?" Sean asked.

Touched by Hannah's gift to Sean, Elijah had forgotten his own package and opened it now. It was a set of headphones that went over the ear instead of in the ear like the ones he was now using. "Guess Hannah figured out we don't share the same taste in music," he said with a smile. "Saving you from my music proves she really likes you." He took another wrapped package out of the box. "This one is for both of us, from Dom and Billy. Since they don't have our address, Hannah sent it along with her presents."

"It was nice of them to send us a gift," Sean commented.

"They've been good friends to me. I hope you get to meet them some day." Elijah unwrapped the gift, then stared, dumbfounded at what his two friends had sent.

Sean took the package from him. "An assortment of flavored lubricants," he observed. "Let’s see. There's banana, grape, strawberry, orange, Pina Colada, even chocolate and vanilla."

"Fuck." Elijah covered his face with his hands. "I'm going to kill them."

"Why?" Sean asked, trying to keep a straight face. "I think it's a very thoughtful gift." He ran his tongue over his lips in a slow, deliberate motion. "Not to mention tasty."

Elijah failed to suppress a giggle. "I know they meant well."

"I'm sure they did," Sean agreed.

Elijah didn't care that Zach and Warren wanted nothing to do with him, but there was one person he truly missed being a part of his first Christmas with Sean. "My Mom loved Christmas," he said wistfully. "I wish you could have known her."

"I'm sorry I never got the chance," Sean told him. "If I had, the first thing I would have told her was how much I love her son, and how lucky I am to have him in my life."

"I know she would have loved you as much as I do." Elijah wiped at his eyes. "So I guess that's the end of the family gifts."

"Not quite," Sean corrected, snagging two more gifts from under the tree. "These two are from Til."

"Open yours first," Elijah suggested.

"All right." Sean opened the flat, square box wrapped in red and gold. It contained an ornate, silver frame in which was displayed a color photo of the two of them. It was a candid shot, obviously taken without their knowledge. Amazingly, Tilda had caught Elijah mid-giggle, and there was Sean standing beside him, looking at him adoringly. "I remember this day," Sean said, the look on his face telling Elijah it was a very pleasant memory. "I had no idea Til was watching us."

"Me, either," Elijah told him. He studied the photo. "I could live to be a hundred and never have as good a photographer's eye as Tilda has."

Sean shook his head. "You already have a good eye," he said. "Tilda herself told you that, so think of all the years you have ahead of you to hone your skills."

But honing those skills couldn't begin until he got a new camera, Elijah reminded himself, and put that thought away for another day.

"You still have to open _your_ present from Til," Sean reminded him, and the mischievous look on his face made Elijah suspect that Sean already knew what that present was.

Between spending time in the kitchen with Tilda, and the cookbooks he'd received from Anna, it seemed to Elijah that the new women in his life were trying to turn him into a chef. He began to unwrap Tilda's gift, expecting to find some kind of cooking gadget. What he found instead had him letting out a whoop of delight.

"Something good?" Sean asked innocently.

"Good?" Elijah repeated with a grin. "It's fucking awesome! Til bought me a new camera!" He stared at the box, then when the reality of the gift had sunk in, he shook his head and said, "Til shouldn't have done this."

"Why not?"

"Because it's too expensive. I can't let her spend this kind of money on me."

Sean chuckled. "You've known Til long enough to know she does what she pleases, and it pleases her to do things for people she loves." He touched Elijah's face gently. "You're one of those people, Elijah, and this is Tilda's way of showing you."

"But you don't understand," Elijah protested. "This is a Canon Rebel. 18 megapixels, five frames per second, image stabilization. I've seen this online for over $500 -- on sale!"

"Tilda wouldn't have spent the money if she couldn't afford it," Sean assured him. "She sees your potential, love, and wants to help you achieve it because doing so will bring her enjoyment." He gave Elijah a stern look obviously intended to make him feel guilty. "You wouldn't want to ruin that pleasure for her, would you?"

Elijah took a moment to reflect on Sean's words, but considering his fingers itched to hold the camera, he didn't need much convincing. "I wouldn't want to hurt her feelings," he replied, then with the unbridled joy of a child who got everything he asked for in his letter to Santa, he ripped open the box and spread its contents on the floor.

Sean nodded in satisfaction. "I'm glad that's settled."

"I can't believe Til did this for me," Elijah marveled. "She even included a stack of memory cards." He picked up the camera and got a feel for it in his hands. "I wish I could try this out right now, but I have to charge the battery first." Sean normally offered him comfort, even in response to the smallest adversity, and when none was forthcoming, Elijah looked at him suspiciously. "What's going on, Sean?" he asked.

Sean's cat-who-swallowed-the-canary smile turned into a wide grin. "Only that Til knew you'd feel that way, so…" He let his words trail off as he got to his feet. Going into the kitchen, he took something out of the cabinet above the sink, then came back and sat down on the floor beside Elijah again. Handing him what he'd retrieved, Sean told him, "Til bought an extra battery and charger so you wouldn't have to wait to use her present. I've had it plugged in since yesterday and it's fully charged, so you're good to go."

"No way!" Elijah responded. He slid the battery into the camera, turned it on and watched it come to life.

Sean said, "Too bad it's dark or you could go outside and take some nature shots."

Elijah shook his head and pointed the camera at Sean. "Why would I go outside when I have the perfect subject right here?" When Sean held up his hands in protest, Elijah urged, "Come on, Sean. I modeled my pajamas for you. Now you have to model yours for me." Sean made no move to get up, so Elijah tried imploring him with his eyes before bringing out the big guns and crooning in his sweetest voice, "Please?"

"Fine," Sean gave in, standing up. "We can use the pictures to prove to Mom that I actually wore her Christmas PJ's."

Despite his attempt at gruffness, Elijah could tell that Sean was secretly flattered by his request to photograph him.

"So what am I supposed to do?" Sean asked.

"Strike a pose, of course," Elijah told him. "This is your chance to be Madonna again."

Sean looked mortified. "I never should have told you about that."

"I'm glad you did," Elijah said with a grin. "Since I missed your performance the first time, tonight I'll get the chance to see it."

"Absolutely not. Madonna may be ageless, but my imitation of her is long past its expiration date."

Elijah could see that Sean planned to stand firm on this, so he tried another tact. "Then just be yourself." At Sean's blank look, Elijah said, "Just move, Sean. You know, work it."

Sean gave it a try, at first mimicking Elijah's motions when he'd modeled his pajamas, then he slowly began to enjoy himself. His movements became less jerky, more sensual, and Elijah happily snapped photo after photo.

"Show me a little more skin," Elijah instructed.

Sean stopped moving. "So you're into pornography now?" he asked.

"It won't be pornographic," Elijah corrected, "just sexy." Sean didn't look convinced, and Elijah wondered if it was possible that Sean didn't realize how attractive he was. Could he not see how incredibly sexy Elijah found him? "We won't send them to your mother," he conceded with a wink. "They'll be for just me to enjoy."

"Fine," Sean said again, and unbuttoned his top button. "How's that?"

"You can do better than that," Elijah said, going to him and undoing two additional buttons. He pulled the soft flannel to both sides of Sean's chest so the V exposed his thick nest of curly chest hair. Elijah kept his hand inside Sean's top, lingering so he could run his fingers through it. The touch produced a low moan deep in his lover's throat, and cupping his hand behind Elijah's neck, Sean pulled him in for a long, deep kiss. Elijah melted into the kiss, molding his body to Sean's.

Reaching around him to cup Elijah's ass with his other hand, Sean broke from the kiss and asked, "What about the photoshoot?"

Elijah moved away from Sean only long enough to place his new camera safely out of the way, under the Christmas tree, then he vaulted back into Sean's arms and the two tumbled back down onto the rug. "Pictures are great," Elijah declared, "but tonight I want the real thing."

Still holding Elijah with one arm, Sean reached out with the other and grabbed the package of flavored lubes from under the tree and dragged it over to where they lay. As he ripped it open, he said, "Remind me to send Billy and Dom a really nice thank-you note in the morning."

*******

The crackling fire in the hearth had faded almost to embers, but they were warm in each other’s arms. The hard floor wasn’t exactly comfortable, but Sean was in no hurry to let go. Elijah’s pajama bottoms lay under the Christmas tree. Sean’s were tangled around his ankles. The tops were still on, sort of, Elijah’s half unbuttoned and hanging off his shoulders, his completely open. Sean drew Elijah close against his naked chest and lazily ran his hand up and down the beautiful curve of Elijah’s lower back under the soft flannel, smiling into those blue eyes. “If Mom only knew.” Flannel pajama sex. Maybe she did know. She and his Dad always wore flannel pajamas in the winter. Elijah gave him a funny look. Sean shook his head with a laugh. He really didn’t want to think about that. He nuzzled a kiss to Elijah’s bared shoulder and hugged him. “A shower and bed, what do you say? We can clean up here in the morning.” Elijah looked at him with sleepy eyes, and nodded.

A steamy hot shower revived them both, but they didn’t linger overlong at it, and quickly dried each other after. They stuffed their new pajamas in the washer and went to bed naked. Elijah wanted the Christmas tree lights left on that night, and Sean gladly obliged him. They lay there together in the twinkling light, and talked a little about going to Iowa in the spring to visit Sean’s family on the farm, until Elijah drifted off to sleep. Sean lay there for a while longer, thinking about Mack.

Wide awake before dawn, Sean carefully left Elijah sleeping and got himself out of bed. He put on the jeans he found on the floor where they’d been tossed the evening before, and the shirt he’d been wearing, then slipped into his boots and coat to go out. It was cold, but the wind was down. It hadn’t snowed since he’d last cleared the porch and steps, that was helpful. He made his way to the shed by flashlight and, once inside with the door closed, turned on the overhead lights. Elijah’s gift was ready, the dark wood gleaming with fresh polish. The desk was too heavy to manhandle around the yard and up the steps by himself, but Sean removed drawers until he could slide it over the snow covered ground on a tarp and then awkwardly carry it up. He went as quietly as he could, holding his breath, until it was safely in place against the porch rail, then went back for the drawers. Another trip to bring up the chair. A last loving swipe of clean, soft cloth over the finish. Then he stuck on a big red bow and covered it with a sheet.

Elijah was blissfully asleep still when he got back inside. Sean applauded his success, quietly kneeling to build up the fire in the hearth. It was a small miracle but he’d done it, and he was proud of the work. He was buzzing with anticipation as he tidied the place up a bit and then set about fixing a special breakfast for Elijah; bacon and scrambled eggs, with a warm from the oven apple crisp on the side. But coffee first.

******

Waking and finding Sean gone, most likely in the bathroom, Elijah snuggled back under the covers, unwilling to leave the warmth and comfort of their bed. Last night had been so wonderful, the happiest Christmas Eve he could remember since his Mom had died, and it wasn't just because of the presents he had received. They were awesome, especially his new camera, but what Elijah had enjoyed more was what had come after, the sex, the shower, and then he and Sean lying in bed together, talking about the future. Sean wanted to take him to Iowa, to the Astin family farm to meet his parents, a prospect Elijah found both exciting and terrifying. Anna had been welcoming to him on the phone, had sent him cookbooks, homemade cookies and flannel pajamas, but when they finally met, when she got to size him up in person, would she be disappointed in the man her son wanted to spend the rest of his life with? And what about his father? Elijah hadn't even spoken to him yet, and knowing how much Sean valued his father's opinion, could Astin make him question his choice of a life partner?

Elijah couldn't let himself think like that. He'd just have to believe that everything would work out because Sean loved him, and that was what mattered. Holding on to that thought, Elijah got out of bed, pulled on jeans and a hoodie, and went to find Sean, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and the tantalizing smell of something baking leading him to the kitchen where Sean stood at the stove. Elijah gave him an enthusiastic good morning kiss, and greeted him with an exuberant, "Merry Christmas!"

Sean kissed him back. "Merry Christmas to you, love."

Elijah sniffed the air, asking, "What smells so good?"

"Apple crisp," Sean replied. "A little something sweet to top off the bacon and eggs I'm fixing for our Christmas breakfast."

"Do we have time to open presents first?" Elijah asked hopefully.

"I thought we'd wait until after breakfast," Sean said, but at Elijah's disappointed look, he sighed. "All right," he began, "why don't you--"

Before Sean could finish his thought, Elijah dashed away, coming back a moment later carrying the remainder of the wrapped packages that had been under the Christmas tree last night and dumping them unceremoniously on the table Sean had taken such care to set with holiday-themed plates he'd had tucked away in the closet for years. "Come on, Sean!" Elijah called excitedly.

Resigned to his defeat, Sean said, "I'll be there in a minute. I just have to finish frying this last piece of bacon and set it all out to drain. You start and I'll catch up when I'm done." He pointed with the fork he was using to turn the bacon and instructed, "Open that one first, the one with the red bow."

Judging by the shape and size of the package, Elijah could see it was a CD, and knowing, like Hannah, that his and Sean's musical tastes were very different, he had to wonder what type of album Sean had chosen for him. It was probably Christmas music, something to play today while they celebrated, making the day more festive. He ripped off the paper, preparing the smile he would show to Sean, but when he saw the cover art, a genuine grin spread over his face. "You've got to be shitting me!" he squealed. "This is the live album from the Smashing Pumpkins concert in Holland in 1992! Where the fuck did you find it, Sean?" 

Sean beamed. "Now that we have internet access, I've become acquainted with eBay, where you can find just about anything you could possibly want. I checked out the CD's in your case and since you had all their other albums, I thought you might want to add this one to your collection."

"You were right," Elijah confirmed. "I've been trying to find this for years. Thank you so much."

Sean finished frying the bacon and placed the strips on a paper towel to drain, then joined Elijah at the table. "Go on, open the rest."

"The CD was enough, Sean," Elijah protested. "You didn't have to buy anything else."

"Of course I did," Sean insisted. "I'm entitled to spoil the man I love on our first Christmas together."

Elijah would have liked to spoil Sean, too, and looked forward to the day he'd have enough money to do it, but it seemed to mean so much to Sean to do this for him that Elijah only smiled and opened the other packages, which contained a book on different species of birds, a subscription to a digital photo magazine, and most surprising, a fancy, black cushion with a tasseled fringe. "This is so cool, Sean," he said, holding it up and admiring it, "but what's it for?"

"To cushion your tender backside when you sit on these hard chairs, of course," Sean said with a smile.

Elijah got up and gave Sean a hug, then he placed the new cushion on the chair and sat down again. "It feels great, Sean, really soft I love it!" There was one wrapped package left on the table and Elijah handed it to Sean, saying, "This one's for you."

A momentary look of surprise came over Sean's face, understandably. During the last year Elijah had lived with Pedar, he hadn't worked at the restaurant, so he hadn't earned a salary or tips, and since the money he'd stolen had been returned to Pedar with Sean's help, Sean knew he didn't have anything to spend on gifts. "Elijah, I didn't expect…"

"It's nothing big," Elijah prefaced, "just a token, but I hope you'll like it."

"I know I will," Sean told him as he took off the paper, "because it's from you." Opening the little square box, he lifted out a chain from which hung a small silver pendant, a set of miniature angel wings. "This is lovely," he said.

"It's not new," Elijah said, feeling embarrassed. "It's actually mine."

"Then why do you want to--"

Elijah put a finger to Sean's lips to silence him. "Let me finish before you say anything." At Sean's nod, Elijah told him, "Mom knew she was dying. She was always the buffer between Warren and me, and she knew how hard it was going to be on me living in the house with him after she was gone, so that last night in the hospital…" Elijah had to stop as the tears came, and Sean waited until he was able to continue. "That last night," he began again, "she gave me this." He wiped at his eyes once more, embarrassed that he was crying again. "She said she wanted me to have a guardian angel watching over me when she couldn't, and now I want you to have it."

"No, Elijah."

"I know it's not expensive," Elijah said, misunderstanding Sean's reluctance. "Pedar didn't like me wearing it so I got tired of arguing and just took it off, but I always kept it close. I thought it might be sterling, but maybe it's just silver-plated."

"That's not it," Sean said softly.

"Then what?"

"Elijah, this was the last gift your mother gave you so I know how much it must mean to you. I couldn't possibly take something so precious away from you."

"Mom wouldn't mind that I gave it to you, Sean," Elijah said. "She was fine with my being gay, but she was always concerned about what kind of a life I was going to have. I know she worried that I'd never find someone who really loved me, someone I could build a life with, but wherever she is, she knows she doesn't have to worry about me anymore because I've found you. And because Mom would be over the moon that I did, I know she'd want you to have this, so please say yes."

"Yes," Sean said, slipping the chain over his head.

"You don't have to wear it," Elijah told him, "unless you really want to."

"I'd like to wear it today," Sean compromised, "in honor of your mother."

"I know she'd like that." Elijah's stomach growled. "And I'd like to have breakfast. I'm starving. Can we eat now?"

"Bacon and eggs coming right up," Sean responded, and when, as if on cue, the oven timer buzzed, he added, "with warm apple crisp on the side."

After breakfast they did the dishes, Sean washing and Elijah drying, and fortified by the hearty meal (apple crisp was now officially his favorite dessert), Elijah finally gathered his courage and said, "I have another present for you, Sean."

"Really? What is it?"

Elijah shifted his weight from one foot to the other. "I can't tell you."

Sean frowned. "I don't understand."

"I could tell you, but it's better if I show you."

Intrigued, Sean dried his hands and said, "Lead the way."

Elijah led him to the loveseat where his laptop was set up. "Sit down," he instructed Sean, handing him a piece of paper, "and type in this web address."

Sean did as he was asked, and when he saw his own face pop up on the screen, he stared at it, dumbfounded. "What is this?"

Elijah explained, "It's my blog--ah…I mean it's your blog. I made it for you." He waited in silence while Sean paged through the site. When Sean didn't comment, Elijah thought for sure he'd made a terrible mistake.

"This has summaries of my books," Sean said finally, "and excerpts, even images of the covers. You did all this?"

"Yeah."

"How?"

Elijah shrugged. "It wasn't hard. I used the information from the book jackets for the summaries, and typed up sections from each book to post. And since we don't have a scanner, I used the cell phone camera to photograph the book covers, then uploaded them."

"And the pictures of me?"

Elijah smiled. "Those I already had. Luckily I'd transferred all the pictures to the laptop before I fell in the lake and ruined your camera, so I had plenty to choose from."

"You wrote about our life together?" Sean wanted to know.

"No!" Elijah answered immediately. "I'd never talk about our personal life. I just used your author bio from the dust jackets, nothing that wasn't already out there."

Sean looked incredulous. "Why did you do this, Elijah?"

"Because you deserve it," Elijah said simply. "Other writers have blogs, so I thought you should have one, too, and since your publisher didn't care enough about you to create one for you, I did it. I know it's not a professional site, but you said your books are out of print, and I thought if people saw the blog and read the excerpts, it might get them interested in you again so by the time your new book comes out, you'll already have an audience for it."

"Whoa, slow down," Sean cautioned. "You're getting way ahead of yourself. I haven't even finished the book yet."

"But you will," Elijah said with conviction, "and if it's a success, maybe your publisher will consider reprinting your earlier books."

Sean shook his head. "I can't believe you did this."

Elijah studied Sean's face carefully, looking for any signs of displeasure or anger. Finally he asked, "So you're not mad? I was so afraid you'd be angry that I did this without first asking you if it was okay."

"Mad?" In answer to his question, Sean pulled Elijah down onto his lap. "Elijah, this is the most amazing thing anyone's ever done for me. I'm surprised, delighted, not to mention impressed by how much work you put into this. You could do this for a living."

Totally relaxed now, Elijah, still sitting on Sean's lap, asked, "So what should we do for the rest of the day?"

"Anything you like," Sean said, "but before we decide, in keeping with the theme, I have one more gift for you, too. It's outside."

So this was the trellis, Elijah thought. Since Sean hadn't mentioned it again, he thought maybe it had been a joke, but now he knew Sean had been serious, and realized he was excited about seeing it. Sliding off Sean's lap, Elijah said, "I can't wait!"

******

High on anticipation, Sean took Elijah's hand and gently squeezed it. "Close your eyes." Elijah closed his eyes. Sean led him to the door and opened it wide. “Okay.” He swept the sheet aside.

Elijah stepped out onto the porch with his eyes wide, looking astounded. “It’s a desk! And you _made_ it?!” He reached out his fingers and lightly brushed them across the dark, shining surface. “Sean…it’s beautiful…thank you!”

Sean caught him close as he reached for a hug. He was shivering. Sean kissed him and told him to go back inside, picking up the chair to set over the threshold. “I’ll bring in the desk while you get your fancy cushion.”

Elijah tossed him a grin. “Oh my god, Sean, I didn’t even get the hint.”

Sean gave him a big smile in return, delighted. He went to get the cushion and Sean carefully lifted the desk through the doorway, slid it the rest of the way in, and got the door closed. Elijah laid the satin cushion over the wooden chair seat, and plopped himself down. He swiveled it this way and that, and tucked up his legs as he liked to do.

Sean waited in suspense. “Does it fit? Is it comfortable?” Elijah said it felt great. Sean heaved his desk over and moved Elijah’s to the window next to it, then rolled Elijah across the floor and brought his laptop from the coffee table, to make sure the height of the desk was just right. It was. Elijah opened all the drawers and found all cubbyholes, looking thoroughly happy with his gift. Sean pointed out his window view in the soft glow of dawn, the snow dusted trees, and the birds and squirrels in the yard. “I moved one of the feeders so you’d be able to see it from here.”

“It’s amazing, Sean, I love it!” Elijah stood and wrapped his arms around Sean’s neck, smiling into his eyes. “But just so you know, I want the trellis too.”

Sean hugged him, laughing. “I think we’ll build that together.”

~fin~


End file.
